By Sasha Sigel
Anger is one of the most feared and neglected emotions in spiritual spaces. It's often labeled as “low vibration,” something to be avoided, suppressed, or transmuted into more palatable emotions. But in our current society, where violence, fascism, and injustice run rampant—anger is an essential tool for surviving and reshaping our world.
This is my defense of anger. Anger is a powerful teacher, a catalyst for change, and a natural human experience on any spiritual or activist path.
The Bait-and-Switch
Recently, I began a 3-day Reiki III (sometimes known as Reiki Master) training. The teacher and organization shall remain unnamed (unless you email me, in which case I will be happy to share the details lol). Having been burned in spiritual communities before, I spent months vetting this teacher. I read three of his books and listened to hours of his interviews. His work offered a deep dive into the Japanese spiritual and religious practices that informed Reiki—specific meditation and mantra practices, and an emphasis on self-practice and living our values beyond hands-on healing.
I loved how he talked about reiju (or attunement) not as some magical, secretive portal into becoming a “healer,” but as a spiritual blessing from teacher to student.
I say I “began” the three-day training because I didn’t make it past the first day. After a standoff with the teacher in front of the class, the day ended in tears—mine—and the declaration that I was “an angry person.”
Ready for the twist?
The focus of this Reiki training turned out to be how to feel as little anger as possible, and thus avoid getting cancer. Yes, you read that correctly.
Additional teachings included:
Depression, migraines, and being robbed on the street are all preventable by our thoughts.
Women should quietly do the dishes rather than redistribute the labor.
Trauma informed practices are unnecessary.
We cannot change the world.
It is okay to “jokingly” call your assistant a “bitch” multiple times.
Here’s one of my favorite examples:
“I have a friend who was vegan, and she got cancer. ‘Why did I get cancer—I’m vegan,’ she asked me.” *
“I told her—it’s because you eat anger. You are always angry, and are angry at people who eat meat. That’s why you got cancer.”
*Notice the healthism and morality related to veganism/wellness/food.
As you can imagine, I was shocked. And, unfortunately, not shocked– this was precisely why I had vetted this teacher so hard. These kinds of beliefs are sadly common in pseudo-spiritual communities. We could talk about the myriad of sexist and ableist bullshit listed above – but those topics are for another post.
For now, let’s focus on the demonization of anger. Equating anger and illness isn’t just offensive and inaccurate—it’s dangerous. It’s victim-blaming disguised as spiritual wisdom, and it promotes a false sense of individual control over complex biological realities.
Let’s Talk Science (Briefly)
I’m not a doctor or scientist and don’t want to veer out of my scope of practice. But, as a yoga teacher and Reiki practitioner, I have seen the anger = illness trope pop up pervasively in spiritual communities. Let’s nip it in the bud and move on.
Of course, stress impacts our physical body—cortisol and inflammation levels are influenced by our environment and experiences. But before we go blaming cancer patients for developing a life-altering disease, let’s turn to science.
According to the Cleveland Clinic:
“Cancer happens when genes that manage cell activity mutate. They create abnormal cells that divide and multiply, eventually disrupting how your body works.”
A nine-year study of over 19,000 adults found that:
“Anger control and negative affect are not associated with breast cancer, melanoma, or total cancer risk, although they may have a small role in risk of prostate, colorectal, and lung cancer.” (Emphasis mine.)
Let’s be clear: anger is a natural and valid human emotion. Suppressing that emotion? Not great. If someone is experiencing intense, chronic, suppressed anger, that deserves care and attention (and not blame.) But implying that someone’s emotional state is solely at fault for a life-threatening disease? That’s not healing– it’s harmful.
Spiritual Bypassing
This teacher advised that when we experience illness or pain, we should simply remember we are the great bright light. To turn away from our shadows and turn towards the light. And when anger or worry arises, simply zoom out until you realize there actually isn’t a problem at all.
This, my friends, is textbook spiritual bypassing. If this term is new to you, know that it was coined in the 1980s by a psychotherapist named John Welwood. He described spiritual bypassing as a "tendency to use spiritual ideas and practices to sidestep or avoid facing unresolved emotional issues, psychological wounds, and unfinished developmental tasks."
This is not what wisdom traditions actually teach. It’s a co-opted version, which encourages us to shut down rather than open up to our human experience. As Sharon Salzburg says, “Mindfulness isn’t about getting rid of anything. It’s about being aware of everything and learning to meet it with love.”
It’s worth considering– who profits from our looking away from anger or worry? Perhaps the power-that-be, who are inflicting harm that might naturally cause anger or worry? Rather than only focusing on our individual experience, we can reflect on the systems around us. What might our anger or worry be pointing towards?
Tea, Thoughts, and Feelings
This Reiki teacher told us to notice angry thoughts but “not invite them in for tea” so we can focus on gratitude. This caught my attention, because many Buddhist traditions advise the exact opposite: do invite your biggest, baddest feelings in for a cup of tea. Sit with them. Learn from them. Know them.
Anger isn’t just a fleeting thought. It’s a full body experience—one that needs to be felt, processed, and respected.
I have had to learn to invite my broken heart to dine with me at the table. It is meaningless to run now. My broken heart is not a judgment or a crime. It is a detailed record of how I have tried to meet the violence of the world with as much openness as possible.”
― Lama Rod Owens
Yes, thoughts and feelings are powerful. Examining and shifting our thought patterns can help us see things clearly and respond effectively. Learning to catastrophize or ruminate less can help break anxiety loops. But that requires engagement with thoughts and feeling, not suppression.
On a personal note, I like to take the “tea” metaphor literally. When a client comes to me for Reiki, we start by having a cup of tea together. They check in with their head, heart and body, welcoming all parts of themselves into the session. Once we know what is alive in us, we can create space to feel (not suppress) it. We can listen to and have a conversation with this part of ourselves.
Anger and Activism
At this moment (and, in most moments of human history) marginalized communities are under attack. I’m not speaking metaphorically now; families are being bombed in Gaza, student protesters are being detained by ICE, and trans folks are having their access to healthcare stripped. Our spiritual practice cannot and must not consist solely of trying to feel gratitude and happiness, and reminding ourselves we are the light.
Where is the place for anger at injustice? At state violence, discrimination, fascism, and genocide? Anger tells us something is wrong. It directs us to where the hurt and harm lies.
While anger might not sustain long-term activism, it can absolutely be a match that lights our fire. Our work for justice is rooted in love and care for humanity, and anger tells us when that love is being threatened. If we keep zooming out until we believe “there is no problem,” as spiritual bypassing suggests, we risk becoming complicit. We mistake detachment for enlightenment.
Anger is essential when our tax dollars fund weapons. When people’s reproductive freedom is threatened. When those next door and across the world are dehumanized and brutalized.
“Systems of dominance have co-opted the work of goodness to keep people from disrupting systemic violence.” - Lama Rod Owens
Practices That (Actually) Help
Anger is a natural and healthy human emotion. Rather than focusing on ways to look away from anger, let’s look at practices that guide us through anger.
1) Grief and Rage Circles
I’ve attended Sasha Heron’s Rage and Grief Cafes for Gaza, where dozens of people scream into pillows, stomp their feet, practice saying “no,” journal, cry, and listen to one another. It’s powerful stuff.
2) Making Art
We can move through challenging emotions nonverbally and creatively. Get out finger paints, markers, or clay– set a timer for 20 minutes and see what comes through. Less planning, more feeling. Bonus points if you destroy your creation afterwards.
3) Meditation
There are specific practices to help us skillfully work with anger. My favorite are RAIN by Tara Brach and the many practices Lama Rod Owens offers in Love and Rage.
4) Reiki
When practiced with integrity, helps us slow down and digest our experience. It offers clarity, presence, and replenishment—not by ignoring anger, but by gently turning toward it.
5) Mutual Aid Work
Connect with others in your community. In my neighborhood, for example, there’s a community group called North Brooklyn Mutual Aid. Neighbors help neighbors through land stewardship, mask distribution, skill sharing, and more. See if there’s a similar group in your area. “Action is the antidote to despair.” - Joan Baez
Rather than suppressing or lashing out from it, we can build an intimate relationship with our anger. The Bhagavad Gita says that yoga is “a journey of the Self, through the Self, to the Self.”
Let’s be steadfast in that journey– even when it gets hard.
Final Thoughts
Anger doesn’t make you sick. Anger isn’t a spiritual failure.
Anger is information. Anger is aliveness. Anger is the body saying: this matters.
Let’s sit with it, move through it, and let it guide us—toward healing, toward justice, and toward love in action.
“My rage is sacred. My rage has aliveness to it, intelligence to it, and the power to change not only me but the world.” - Lama Rod Owens
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Let’s feel through it together.